I was 32 years old when my minivan was t-boned by a driver who ran a red light and smashed into the side of me at 55+ mph. I heard the scream of one of my twins in the back seat as we whirled in circles down the road, eventually coming to a stop 50 feet from where we had started. My heart pounded in my chest, the smell of smoke, the sound of the horn continuously blaring all sent my body into survival mode as I tried prying my door open and getting my twins to safety on the side of the road. I went into shock as I waited on my husband to arrive, shaking violently in the back seat of my parent's vehicle. We rushed straight to the emergency room where we could be checked over by a team of doctors and nurses. I didn't realize it then, but my entire world was about to change because of this one monumental point in time.
You see, I went through almost three years of physical therapy in order to retrain my body to reduce it's fight or flight response in any given situation where stress or exertion were involved. I would exert myself a little too much playing with the twins, or move a heavy object and my body would throw itself into survival mode, reducing resources and shutting itself down. I worked with a pain specialist and went through 3 surgeries to sever nerves in my neck so that I wouldn't feel the biting pain that stress caused me. It was during this time my body started to add on the pounds. It was also during this time it decided to go through a bout of Shingles and develop Hashimoto's Thyroiditis.
I felt hopeless and weak as I fought my body so hard only to let pain and immobility win. It was like drowning in a sea of self pity with everyone around me telling me it wasn't my fault. But it was... I could have dieted harder, looked into alternative therapies more, did SOMETHING different. It was my fault, and I was worthless.
At least that's what I thought at the time. I now know different. I have the ability within myself to overcome those fears and anxieties. I know they are just words that have no meaning to them.
I will blog about my journey on a weight loss program here at Healthy Image Colorado, meant to retrain my body, retrain my fat, and most importantly, retrain my mind.
In the meantime, I'd LOVE to hear your stories of how you got to where you are and what you want to do about it. You are my inspiration and my reason to be doing what I do. Share with me below!